Code of Conduct for Foreigners

[Jonathan]

Hi team,

I am trying to formulate a set of "rules" or guidance for foreigners, both here in Serbia but also generally.

My starter 10 are here:

1. Obey the laws - Obey the laws of the land, even the petty bureaucratic laws 2. Contribute - Give something back economically, socially and culturally
3. Be positive- Focus on the positives of your new home
4. Be loyal - Be as loyal as you can to your host country
5. Learn the language - Make an effort to learn at least the basics of the language
6. Learn the history - Learn about the history of the country and its peoples
7. Be neutral - Try and be as neutral as possible on contentious local matters or conflicts
8. Try not to judge - Try not to be too judgemental about local negative. Nowhere is perfect
9. Show, don't tell - Do not lecture the locals about how to be, act, think. Teach by example, not complaint
10. If you hate the place, leave - If you hate the place, do not inflict your misery on others, be brave and leave


From: http://www.belgradefvc.com/wiki/inde...for_Foreigners

I will expand on these, but what else would you suggest I add or remove from this list?

The idea, again, is both a code of conduct for "good" immigrants and foreigners, the sort of people we want in the club (as opposed to the negative, condescending, complainers who hate the place)

[Alfa8c]

Don't you think the process of living in a different country (regardless of one's reasons) is a far more dynamic thing than be covered in a set of 10 "rules"? What are you trying to prove here exactly?

I think 1, 7 & 8 are a bit rich to be honest....

[BGNY65]

I was really going to skip this...BUT, again what the heck.....I am a bit baffled by this post, to be honest I too do NOT understand the point of it, and to a "degree" find it a bit insulting ! (I say this with 50% of both SERB and AMERICAN mentality running through my veins) ! Do foreigners departing other host countries leave these type of rules and advise??

Lets begin with:
7. Be neutral - Try and be as neutral as possible on contentious local matters or conflicts
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My American mentality understands your point of view and you are correct, Serbs tend to be stubborn and passionate about their struggles/battles throughout history. But, then my Serbian mentality pops out,
telling me that (even after residing here for a few years) your stance/ideas/views as a foreigner are obviously always
pointed in one direction. Serbs treasure their history and traditions at a higher level, and as with
love, being neutral is also a two way street...I think that's were foreigners and Serbs get into "heated discussions" as in my opinion "foreigners" tend to lack or look deeper within their own politics and easier forget the
wrong doings of their own government and country (past/present) history, I need NOT remind you, that Serbia, nor the Serbs ever (throughout history) traveled for months/years across the globe in large ships to conquer lands far far away, nor did they ever set up the slave trade etc. I assume this broken old record has been played before ... but let's be neutral!

# 1. Obey the laws - There are 11.1million illegal immigrants living in the US, does anyone give them advise
about breaking the law...when they are obvioulsy doing it just by being there.

# 3 Be positive -Sounds like advise you give to someone going to prison for a few years.
Aside from good healthy organic food/water descent restaurants/night-cultural life etc.
In my opinion Serbia is one of the safest places on earth for foreigners.

# 5. Learn the language -
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Even though I encourage and love to hear when foreigners learn Serbian
95% of the poplutaion in Miami doesn't speak English. I have a friend
whos mother has lived in the USA since 1959 and cannot put 2 sentences together,
why are rules not served to them?


# 6. Learn the history -
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(If people REALLY and truly understood the complex, and confusing history
and struggles of the Serbian people we would not need # 7).

# 9. Show, don't tell - Do not lecture the locals about how to be, act, think. Teach by example, not complaint
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(Who decided what a foreigner "teaches/thinks/acts like toward a Serb " is the CORRECT example??)

# 10. If you hate the place -
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Why would anyone come in the first place if they didn't wish to experience a new culture etc.
I doubt anyone put a gun to someones head, or that anyone working in Serbia is making
million Euro salaries and "being forced to live here for the money".

Just my input... !!

[Jonathan]

Don't you think the process of living in a different country (regardless of one's reasons) is a far more dynamic thing than be covered in a set of 10 "rules"? What are you trying to prove here exactly?

I think 1, 7 & 8 are a bit rich to be honest....

I am not trying to prove anything?

I was going to be a code of conduct for the club, but I decided against that.

I was curious about what people's idea are for successful integration and settlement. There have been a great response over on the Facebook side.

If you don't like the idea, no one is asking you to obey these rules or even comment.

[Jonathan]

I was really going to skip this...BUT, again what the heck.....I am a bit baffled by this post, to be honest I too do NOT understand the point of it, and to a "degree" find it a bit insulting ! (I say this with 50% of both SERB and AMERICAN mentality running through my veins) ! Do foreigners departing other host countries leave these type of rules and advise??

Thanks for the input. This is a thought experiment.

It is not specific to Serbia. It is general advice.

I am baffled that you could find anything insulting in this guidance. What exactly is insulting?

FYI, I am not going home, just emigrating from one foreign country to another, so part of this is advice for me in my new home.

[Manwithbeard]

@ Johnathon

Interesting thread .

Having spent the last thirty years living outside of my home country, in Africa, Middle-East and South Eastern Europe, I agree with much of the content of your ten notes of guidance above.

The only exception being No 4 - Be loyal. I agree one shouldn't be overly or outspokenly critical of a host country but loyal? No.

On InterNations Ex-Pat Q&A forum can be found the thread "What 5 tips would you give to a future expat?"

My six-pennorth was this:


1. Check out the relevant InterNations forum .

2. Visit Geerd Hofstede's website to gauge the cultural difference between your home and host countries:

http://geert-hofstede.com/countries.html

3. Be prepared to experience culture shock.

4. If you can, visit your home country after 3-6months. It isn't as wonderful as you remember and your host country isn't as bad as you may think.

5. Be open minded, non-judgmental and willing to try all the new experiences and opportunities your host country has to offer.


Learning the local language, reading about the host country's history and culture, attempting to understand the illogical (to you) local attitudes and behaviour, all contribute to a more enjoyable and enriching life in a host country.

David

[BGNY65]

Sorry Jonathon, Perhaps I am misinterpreting you, (sometimes tends to happen with cyber msges).

BUT, if its not specific to Serbia, and general advice, why is it being posted on a site pertaining to Serbia.
IN ALLLLLLLLL HONESTY, if the shoe was on the other foot, and I was departing Denmark (assuming that is
your homeland), you would not have a problem with a "Serb" departing the country
posting a message for Danes (and others) not to advise how to act, think but rather
teach Danes by example.....I am sure that most Danes would find it comical coming from a Serb.

I am fully aware of all the stereotypes/comments made by foreigners toward Serbs, as I am also
aware of all the sterotypes/comments Serbs make about western foreigners (which you
may or may not be familiar with) ...
So again, my question is 'WHO" teaches/preaches the RIGHT EXAMPLE? (perhaps I am mistaken
but it seems we both know what was implied above, I am just trying to be neutral) !

Wish you all the best with your move!

[Jonathan]

@David, thanks for the feedback. Loved the contribution and will integrate it into my final list. On the matter of Loyalty, I am not advocating the Tebbit test, but rather thinking that to whatever degree you can, try and support you new home as much as possible. Supporting Joco and the various Serbian teams has been a pleasure for me.

@BGNY65, I posted it on this site because as the founder of the club, it is the best place for me to canvas trusted opinions from fellow foreigners and expats. Maybe, just maybe, I will set up another club like this one, but in Copenhagen this time. Denmark is not my homeland. I will be an immigrant there like I am here. Regarding the teach by example rule, it is aimed at those foreigners who arrive with a missionary zeal and think that they know better than the "natives". Its a very rapid road to isolation and unpleasantness to lecture people about their country - right or wrong. So my advice is show don't tell. Practice what you would usually preach. This also applies professionally. And again, this is advice for ANYONE immigrating ANYWHERE. If you chose to take offence, so be it. Your objection is noted.

[pranch]

4. If you can, visit your home country after 3-6months. It isn't as wonderful as you remember and your host country isn't as bad as you may think.

Lol. How very true! I experienced that after my first long stay of 6 months. I

[ysabelmilby]

I think it's a great list. It's an etiquette. Don't compare this list to those who don't do this, because maybe they don't know how to really act in other country. Not because most people/foreigners/tourist don't do most of the list, you think can also not do it? It's an ethical act as a visitor to their country and we can just do it out of respect to their land (though most of them are neglecting their own country). But in the end, it's still up to you "if" you can even do anything in the list.